Should i ask for an explanation

No one likes to say those words for fear of sounding slow on the uptake. How do you ask for clarification? Grammarly can save you from misspellings, grammatical and punctuation mistakes, and other writing issues on all your favorite websites. In fact, guessing and getting it wrong is more likely to cause problems than politely asking for more info.

There are all kinds of situations where you might need to ask clarifying questions. You want me to explain the whole thing all over again? To avoid that loop, start by explaining what you do understand and ask whether you have it right. How will you feel if he gives you a list of reasons he doesn't like you? You'll get your closure, but your self-esteem might take a hit. You'll also look desperate in the process.

I don't know how long you dated this guy, but do the reasons he stopped calling you really matter? For starters, there probably aren't any real reasons. People just don't mesh sometimes. That's life. If he does have reasons, who cares?

He's one guy with one opinion and you know what they say about opinions. Are you going to take his critique and a make a list of things to change about yourself? I hope not. If you've had lots of dates with lots of guys and no callbacks, yeah, okay, there might be something you're doing to drive them off, and you might want to figure out what it is.

But one guy? Another reason to let it go is that it's good practice for the rest of your life. This won't be the last time you get rejected without knowing why; it happens all the time, and not just in romance.

Someone gets promoted over you at work. You get laid off and that lazy, incompetent jackass in the cube across from you gets to stay. You don't get invited to a neighbor's party. The girls go to dinner without you. You run for PTA at your kid's school and don't win. Life is full of rejection, and we rarely know the reasons. The speaker also benefits by being reassured that their audience is actively listening and genuinely interested in what they have to say.

Clarifying questions don't typically require new information from the speaker. They are instead used by the listener to get a clearer factual understanding of what the speaker wants to transmit. They can be used in any situation where someone is trying to communicate a message to an audience, such as interviews, presentations, discussions and other similar circumstances.

Related: Types of Questions: Definitions and Examples. The two main situations in which you can ask for clarification are:. Clarifying questions are a good way to troubleshoot when you receive unclear instructions. Explaining a complex task can be difficult, so it is in the interest of both the speaker and the listener that the details of the task are entirely clear.

Reiterating a message can be frustrating for the speaker, so when the instructions aren't clear the listener should ask a closed clarifying question by saying what they understand and asking for confirmation on whether they got it right. Clarifying questions are also a good way of properly understanding the nuances of someone's opinion. By asking open clarifying questions, the listener is making the speaker elaborate on their thoughts and providing a more detailed version of them.

This not only helps the listener better understand what the speaker meant but also helps them form an opinion of their own regarding the speaker's views. Here are some examples of open and closed clarifying questions in multiple situations:. It's best that you are not vague when asking for further clarification.

You should openly admit that you need more information to properly understand what the speaker is trying to transmit. If the conversation is a long and complex one, you should briefly specify the parts that you understood from the speaker's message and use them to help the speaker see exactly where you need further clarification. It is generally more efficient to make the speaker understand that it is not their fault that you weren't able to properly understand what they had to say.

By not sounding accusatory you are more likely to get the clarification you are after. It's important that you make the speaker see exactly where you need clarification. This way they can focus on providing clearer explanations in those specific parts instead of them having to figure out what parts you did not understand. The tone of your voice can make the same sentence sound completely different to the other person.

When asking clarifying questions, you should have a clearly inquisitive tone, so the speaker knows that the question's purpose is not accusatory, but simply an admittance that you need further clarification. You should thank the person offering the clarification, as a sign of appreciation for them taking the time to explain the concept further.